not many dreams – some reality

For a long time I tried so hard to give up the ’self’ – the mind-created fictional definition that my ego has created and continues to polish, refine, and propagate. I think I shared P’s fear that loss of ’self’ would include loss of edge – of joy of living, of a sense of humor, the enjoyment of an occasional humorous, cynical or sardonic moment. I don’t think that’s how it is anymore. I think the trying, striving, wishing and reaching are antithetical to truly letting go of all this stuff, even if what you’re reaching for is ‘enlightenment’ or ‘presence’. Newsflash – you don’t reach for presence, you just do it. It’s all there is – right now. It’s like asking a tree or a robin what their plans are for next Monday afternoon.